Embrace Your Shakti

We have been taught that to some degree we are the keepers of other emotions. Thus if our pain makes others uncomfortable we must minimize the expression of it. To suffer in Silence is almost the golden standard. It is seen as an indicator of strength. However that is not the case. By keeping it inside you make a pact, one where you get weaker and your pain gets stronger. Slowly engulfing you. Vulnerability is the true testament of strength. For it takes an incredible amount of courage to relive your traumas, so that you can process and cope with it in a healthier way. You might think there is nobody that understands, or that you don’t know how to take the first step. To that I say it is ok. Sometimes it takes time to find your tribe who truly gets you, other times it means reaching out to a Mental Health professional. Here are some suggestions in navigating the Mental Healthcare System:

1. Therapy: Therapy can be such a powerful tool, especially once you find the right fit. There are two factors that play a role in this. The first figuring out what type of Therapy is the best type for you. The most common type of therapy that many know about is called Talk Therapy. In this therapy you do just that. You talk about the traumas and struggles that you are processing. Another time that I am really familiar with is  Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. A part of this therapy still has a component around unpacking and processing trauma. However the heavier focus is on tacking the automatic learned behaviors and trauma responses that once kept us safe but now it is detrimental to our own well being. Essentially you learn how to pause and think about your thoughts and behaviors in real time. I am attaching this link to an article that does a great job describing different types of therapy. (LINK) The second factor is finding a therapist that you vibe well with. For some this may be having a therapist who comes from the same community as them. Others have a therapist who understands how intersectionality plays a role in one’s mental health. Think of finding the right therapist like dating. The first few meetings may be awkward and that is ok. Furthermore after a few appointments you may decide that the therapist you are currently seeing is not a great match for you and that you may decide to try another therapist. That is also totally valid and ok. Not sure where to start, here are a few places that I suggest taking a look at:
   1. If you are a college student check in with your college to see if they have an on campus therapist they can refer you to, typically the cost per visit is already covered under tuition. 
   2. Another great resource is San Mateo Behavioral Health and Recover Services. This is a service provided to medi-cal and underinsured folks living in San Mateo County. They will help you connect with mental health providers that meet your needs.
   3.  Antar is an amazing platform that aims to connect South Asians with South Asian therapists. They service the whole United States. Antar’s goal is to make therapy more accessible to South Asians by providing culturally competent therapy and removing the language barrier. 
   4. Lastly check in with your Primary care provider, as they should be able to refer you to a therapist in the area. 

Antidepressants: I know I know this sounds crazy, a big no no so to speak. However this isn’t the case. It is totally normal and valid if you need to pursue the medical route. Sometimes the trauma cuts so deep it wounds on a psychological level. Plus some of us are naturally born with chemical imbalances in our brains that make us more susceptible to needing medication with therapy to truly help ourselves feel better. That is totally valid, normal and ok. Needing medication doesn’t make you weak or any less of a person. I wish I could say that starting medication was easy but like therapy there is a lot of trial and error. The best advice I can give in taking this route is to give it time for the medication to kick in but at the same time if it’s been a few weeks with little to no improvement let your doctor know. This article by National Health Service UK, gives an amazing breakdown on types of Antidepressant and some things to keep an eye out for when on antidepressants.