Embrace Your Shakti

In every Hindu Desi home, when there is a Festival around the corner, especially Diwali, there is a heavy emphasis on having a perfect clean home. The walls must be wiped, the floors swept, the dishes washed and the list goes on. In a perfect world the house would be spotless, for this would be the only way to welcome Laxmi Ma ( Goddess of Wealth and Prosperity)  But does having a clean house mean that a house can’t look like people live there. In the name of festivals, we work towards an unreachable goal, and when it becomes all too much we start to let go of the loose ends. The task of maintenance gets left undone, as our need to reserve our energy kicks in. Many times it won’t be until the next festival, or the phone call that guests are coming, that we snap ourselves out of this phase. Only to embark on the same journey with the same results. 

Now I am not saying that we shouldn’t clean our homes, though how nice it would be if our homes could clean themselves. I am saying it’s time to reframe how we approach home hygiene. I will be first to admit that at times I put off cleaning my room if I am feeling emotionally and/or physically drained. Upon reflection I realized rather than cleaning my room in a way that met my needs of the day, my thought process had become if I will clean this aspect of my home it must be the whole space. Thus 2 things usually ended up happening: 1) I would overwork myself and have a clean space, but lack the energy to maintain this space or another aspect in my life. 2) I would put off the project for another day. 

This Diwali while I was cleaning my home, I found myself thinking there has to be a balance. One where I can honor my ancestral traditions, while tending to my needs as someone with a disability and the needs of my aging parents. There this superstition I grew up hearing “ what you do on Diwali, you will do all year ( till next Diwali)” So if part of my room wasn’t spotless, or my health was acting up, I found myself thinking great another year battling to make my room spotless, great another year of health issues. This year I decided to try something different. I decided to adjust my perspective. If there was clutter but the main points of the home were clean, I thought of it as this is a home that is lived in and some clutter and that is ok and normal. If I was dealing with symptoms of my disability that were forcing me to slow down, rather than thinking of more health issues, I thought I am nurturing my body and taking care of myself. Both of these things are vital and valid. 

Rather than striving for perfection, I am learning to strive for what is attainable. So if one day all I can do is cook and then do the dishes that is ok. If all I can do another day is laundry and vacuuming that is ok. And if I can’t complete a task on my own it is ok to ask for help and voice where I am at physically and mentally. This Diwali I learned to truly embrace my Shakti, I don’t need to do everything perfectly, just at what my capacity that given day.

Remember to always embrace your Shakti,

Max